Terrified of life

I'm so terrified of being
that being terrified is just a side effect
and real life is hard
and safe sex an hazard
Affecting the night
with strokes of pain
and a short sight
of the future - a game
with cloudy rules and a right
to be messy and dark
But present, please
be kind
and hold me through the night.
Ease me into sleep and dissolve the fear
of pain and real.